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Want to draw like me? No? Tough.

1/15/14 by JJCripps1996
Updated 1/15/14

What's this alternative text all about?

Hello! So Basically, Since I'm not doing a lot (apart from college obviously) I've decided to do some of those silly "How to draw..so and so" pages, so basically, comment me anything that you've seen me draw and thought to yourself "I wonder how you draw that? Do you just draw it, or are there certain rules?" like, a robot I drew a while back, or if you want me to show you the ways of drawing Crabsticks! Or maybe you just want to know the rules of 'How to draw like Jordan in general!' feed me comments, don't be shy! Or go ahead and be Mr. (or Mrs, ladies ;D) shyten of shywood, where everyone's too chicken to communicate to one another.


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DoomroarDoomroar

2/25/14

Some times being bad feels pretty damn good!


DoomroarDoomroar

2/24/14

Stop right there you criminal scum!

2/25/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

You've violated my mother,
YOU WILL PAY THE PRICE!


DoomroarDoomroar

2/22/14

Is what all gods en doing anyway, we will bang ok?

2/24/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

That's not a real queen..


DoomroarDoomroar

2/21/14

Combo breaker.

2/22/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

I like how we've gone straight from being gods over several universes, to just saying quotes from these hilarious YouTube videos :D


DoomroarDoomroar

2/20/14

Lets change the subject.

2/20/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

Yes. lets


DoomroarDoomroar

2/18/14

You are lying Morgan!

2/19/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

Why are you dressed like a god damned woman!?


DoomroarDoomroar

2/17/14

As well as these nuts?

2/17/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

Yes..


DoomroarDoomroar

2/15/14

It had cocks everywhere and not enough pussiiiiiieeee, it was called the cloud district universe:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yuO9HdFEJLE

2/16/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

Let's get to bashing butts!


DoomroarDoomroar

2/14/14

They jumped straight to the traps, it was so effective that the normals were getting even more scarce, so they decided to use day time TV to bait them in... and that is how the normals went extinct, without any normal to use as comparison weirdness became the new normal, and the world started to mutate into something a little bit more averagely common.

2/15/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

well, that's yet ANOTHER universe officially cocked up.


DoomroarDoomroar

2/13/14

It was the most rare hunt game because normals were really hard to find, sneaky sneaky normals.

2/14/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

So they laid out traps for the normals, they would build huge mousetraps with boring square cars placed on them, and wait until they took the bait,


DoomroarDoomroar

2/12/14

And the boring people became exotic all of a sudden.

2/13/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

So exotic that people could to pay to hunt them down to the point of near extinction!


DoomroarDoomroar

2/11/14

However normally was weird, and weird was normally, the world was in balance.

2/12/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

So weird and normal have swapped around, but who cares! I'd rather live in a world where a giant shark with maces for arms and legs is considered normal, rather than a boring square house or a phone that is just a brick, why can't we have phones that are also small guns, and also deposit liquorice?! Noooo that's considered too weird! NOT ANYMORE BECAUSE WEIRD IS NORMAL SO STUFF THE BORING PEOPLE!


DoomroarDoomroar

2/10/14

You did? oh how nice of you... hey... oh well, being nice to good god should be ok.

2/11/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

And so, balance was restored between the two gods, everyone still hated the shitty god, and everyone still loved the good god, and so, as the flaming cockroaches rained down from the sky, the world could continue normally..


DoomroarDoomroar

2/10/14

Please do.

2/10/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

I already did


DoomroarDoomroar

2/10/14

Well they just want you to hear their curses, that is plenty coming from a shitty god, i mean you gave them hope, but even that hope was shitty, however even shitty hope is hope. Yo! cut it there with the hope dats ma job!

2/10/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

Hey! It ain't my fault that they're all hoping for me! I'll spray them with a shower of flaming cockroaches if it makes you feel any better!


DoomroarDoomroar

2/9/14

You gave them hope, the hope of getting their screams and curses to maybe someday reach you, oh what a great god, so goo... hold it! what the hell!? that is too good! are you trying to steal my job as good god? are you making a revolt now?

2/10/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

Not really, considering I don't actually do anything when they scream, but yet they still scream, hoping I'll fix all their problems, I think it's their own fault for still believing in me to be fair,


DoomroarDoomroar

2/8/14

Hahaha you just want them to remember why is that you are the shitty god, i can already hear the screams and the curses as the statue collapses, oh so priceless, but well anyway is highly possible that if they wanted to contact shitty god what they wanted was to scream and curse from the beginning.

2/8/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

They have been, even before I made my talking clock, they just now have an alternative, impossible way of communicating to me,


DoomroarDoomroar

2/8/14

Ah great job shitty god, if the statue collapses they never get a real change to call you haha, on the other hand if they are resilient enough they can get a slim change to talk with me if they are lucky enough to find my sharkphone that is.

2/8/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

I never said it was impossible to call me, you just have to be very fast when legging it out of the great collapsing statue,


DoomroarDoomroar

2/7/14

Oh so showy, with such a big structure to find it and then subsequently contact you should be easy, my sharkphone should be hidden in the deepest part of the cosmos, with only a handful of clues leading to it.

Yes, to contact the good god, will be an adventure, an adventure so epic that once they get to the phone they would no longer know why they even wanted to call me to begin with.

2/7/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

AHA! But the dinosaur itself isn't the phone, the phone is situated in a booby trap filled dungeon, in the head of the T-Rex, which can only be entered by the secret entrance via the anus, and when the phone is rang, the whole statue collapses in on itself, then, after a week, the statue rebuilds instantly, ready for the next crew of adventurers..


DoomroarDoomroar

2/6/14

So it seems, in that case my will be shaped like the jaw of a shark that got the rabies.

2/7/14 (Updated 2/7/14) JJCripps1996 responds:

Mine shall be in the shape of a T-Rex, and will be located in the middle of the pacific ocean, it will tower over all cities, and will be made of GOLD! (Since gold is now redundant and not worth anything anymore)


DoomroarDoomroar

2/6/14

Ah i cant believe we are gods and yet we are making compromises!

2/6/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

We may be gods, but there is a limit to our powers..surprisingly


DoomroarDoomroar

2/5/14

But we live outside of time, just how long is 5 minutes anyway?

2/6/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

We'll have to get them to invent the talking clock, and just occasionally phone that up


DoomroarDoomroar

2/5/14

Shitty god... i don't know how to tell you this... but our new universe has a deadly disease on it!
It has humans! oh wait, the other ones also had humans... but the other ones also failed... i am seeing a pattern here.

2/5/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

Why don't we just leave this universe alone, and don't tinker with it whatsoever, THEN if they haven't blown up into oblivion within the first five minutes, we must reach the conclusion that WE need to pass a course in "universal creating"


DoomroarDoomroar

2/4/14

The universe has freed itself from us, the skeptics have won!
Oh Myself no!

2/4/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

Damn...okay fine, we'll build ONE MORE universe, see how that goes..


DoomroarDoomroar

2/4/14

Yeah so who are we to not say that what we are seeing is not just a bunch of magnetic sand floating away?
I mean, is not like we are gods or anything like that... oh wait.

2/4/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

oh wait..that means..we no longer HAVE THE POWER TO CONTROL THE COURSE OF NATURE!!!! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!


DoomroarDoomroar

2/4/14

Well i was coming more from the point of, since we are gods... we can see all, but we don't see them, because they are invisible sand traffickers!!

2/4/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

But, then technically all we can see is a bunch of sand suddenly floating and flying off over the border


DoomroarDoomroar

2/3/14

Sure the sand people care about sand, but you don't see sand traffickers kidnapping sand people for their sand orgasm...

2/4/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

Of course you don't see them! They smuggle the sand undercover! They don't just wander around in public going "Oh hey all! I'm just off to kidnap some sand for my own sexual needs!"


DoomroarDoomroar

2/2/14

Well i think that with so much gold, gold itself will devaluate and people will lost interest in stealing, like sand... is everywhere so no one goes around making a big deal over sand.

2/3/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

apart from the sand people, obviously,


DoomroarDoomroar

2/2/14

Forget that, everyone should make gold states of everything, it would be like a second universe made out of gold! but in a smaller scale.

2/2/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

But the gold universe would have to be under some pretty heavy protection, in case any robbers try and sneak in and snatch a few golden people.


DoomroarDoomroar

2/2/14

Why stopping there? you deserve a whole zoo of exotic animals made out of gold!

2/2/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

forget animals! Even famous figures! Like Robot Lincoln and Mummy Washington!


DoomroarDoomroar

2/1/14

What a hard working shitty god!

2/2/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

I deserve three times more farmyard golden animal statues!


DoomroarDoomroar

2/1/14

Well i don't know, since none of those universes can evolve... they seem pretty pointless, static on its finest, but at least they don't have to deal with entropy, so i guess we did indeed quite a damn good job!

2/1/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

okay then, time to build another universe and ruin it in the process!


DoomroarDoomroar

1/31/14

So without change the universe was essentially death submerged in an eternal loop.

2/1/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

so we've now made two identical universes, both on a set infinite doom loop,
we are pretty good in the god business I think.


DoomroarDoomroar

1/31/14

And another one was made.

1/31/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

And it was identical to the last.


DoomroarDoomroar

1/31/14

Ditto & Bis, then repeat.

1/31/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

well it seems we've cocked up not only yet another planet, but the entire universe..lets make another one.


DoomroarDoomroar

1/30/14

The universe was mirrored, filled with black and white holes and with no orange ones.

A contrary image of what i used to be, the universe was now starting to fill with the faithful followers of the gods... once again.

1/31/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

and so, the entire cycle would surely start again, and again..and again..and..again, and so forth!


DoomroarDoomroar

1/30/14

The orange holes released so much matter in the form of heavy elements into the center of the universe that the gravitational pull started to accelerate a big crunch effect, the universe was about to implode.

1/30/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

But with the implosion, an explosion would happen straight after, flinging every thing that had been sucked into the holes, back out again, but into the complete opposite way, and the orange holes sucked into each other and vanished, plotting there revenge straight away,
as for the whole universe, it was safe,
but had now been mirrored.


DoomroarDoomroar

1/30/14

(Actually my man.... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/White_hole so yeah... is not that they push matter away is that you can not enter them, and some are supposed to be the other halve of worm holes, the exit half)

As shitty god filled the universe with more and more white holes, and black holes, the skeptics started to mobilize and grow in strength, appealing the organized workers who never had enough to spend into worship statues, appealing to the extremely rich that didn't really want to invest their gold on useless statues, appealing to the communist, to the capitalist, to the conscious and the stupid, to young and old, a revolution was born, more and more, the inhabitants of the universe stopped considering the gods.

The war was coming to an end, the dogma revolution was ending it.

1/30/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

And as the good god explained to the shitty god all about white holes, shitty god then created orange holes, a strange vortex that does nothing but constantly fire out rubies and diamonds and golden goblets and riches beyond your wildest dreams, and dumped them all at the very centre of the universe itself, so that the riches would eventually arrive at everyone's doorsteps!


DoomroarDoomroar

1/30/14

War was still rampaging across the cosmos, perils like never before started to appear black holes from nowhere decimated entire armies, no one was safe, between the wrath of the shitty god and the synthetically perils brought by the war the universe was in the verge of become uninhabitable, as usual people blamed all that shit on the shitty god, but one day... one little guy in the verge of dying asked: "ah good god why do you allow this shit?" good god hardly gets any questions directed towards him, so i was able to answer him with swiftness "because otherwise shitty god would get boring..." and with his last breath the dying man screamed at the cosmos cursing all the gods.

Atheism and Skepticism was born.

1/30/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

And while this was happening, shitty god created white holes, a complete opposite to black holes, and instead push everything away from them,
and he threw them all over the universe as well, unaware of this new invention of atheism and skepticism.


DoomroarDoomroar

1/29/14

Worshiping became too much of a social problem, the economic differences started to became too obvious, the working class was being oppressed like never before, nad unable to contribute into the gold offerings they were ostracized, exploited and discriminated will being also the ones working the hardest the laborers of the universe united to fight against the dominant classes.

Communism was reborn.
The universe enters into war. During this time all the golden offerings were halted, and with no one to properly worship him the shitty god decided to make an intervention.

1/30/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

when I made an 'intervention' what I actually did was just start throwing black holes across random parts of the universe, that'll teach them to stop giving ME golden farmyard animals!!


DoomroarDoomroar

1/29/14

They will need to start getting gold from other worlds.

1/29/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

and so, intergalactic banking loans were created


DoomroarDoomroar

1/28/14

Well is a double mebius world so it fits.

1/29/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

fair enough,
and I've decided to add two more moons, so they have a bit more room for my statues before all three moons collide with the planet again in a molten gold fire fury,


DoomroarDoomroar

1/27/14

Ditto & Bis, then repeat.

1/28/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

it seems whenever we make a world, we end up setting it on an infinite loop


DoomroarDoomroar

1/25/14

With the passing of the years the moon started to take a golden hue, and its mass was so great that it ended colliding with the world, gold rained that day, in the middle of the chaos and horrors brought by the collapsing moon, the people where joyous, for all the gold was returning to them, in the form of molten killer gold raining from the sky.

Sadly the magnitude of the moon crashing against the world caused the extinction of the Chainsaurs, but with all the gold to their disposition a project was funded to bring them back to life with science!

1/27/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

and so, the cycle of making a new moon, filling it with new golden statues and then that one colliding with the planet, started again


DoomroarDoomroar

1/23/14

Giant golden statues? nice, nice i want mine to look like me, because i am god after all, that will be probably the most rational thing that world will ever have.

1/24/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

Yes, they shall have to give me one golden statue of a farmyard animal yearly, but every year they shall have to make the farmyard animal different, and after I have accepted there prize, they shall then have to dump there statue onto my new moon that I've created, specifically made for dumping golden statues onto


DoomroarDoomroar

1/21/14

Ah it is shaping quite well, now i hope they change their worship practices, i don't want my tribute to by paid in farts...

1/23/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

I want mine to be paid in giant golden statues of farmyard animals!


DoomroarDoomroar

1/20/14

Plus they get Chain-saurs, sure the Chain-saurs that survived the collision maybe mad and dangerous but they are also cool as hell so that's a bonus.

1/21/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

We could give them the powers to tame my beasts, so then they could ride them, which is an even bigger bonus,
plus I think I left my necromancy manual on our new planet, so someone's probably gonna find that and start summoning an army of skeletons.


DoomroarDoomroar

1/20/14

We are the reason they are alive now! on a multidimensional moebius planet! i only expect praise and eternal worship from them.

1/20/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

Good point, AND they can use all the diseased from the previous two planets as fossil fuel!


DoomroarDoomroar

1/20/14

Nah let him, i like how it sounds, is going to be some interesting lore.

1/20/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

Ok ok, but when the entire humanity stands up against us cause we killed two planets, you're on your own!


DoomroarDoomroar

1/19/14

Oh i can see the results already! no, no wait, false alarm, just a survivor.

1/19/14 JJCripps1996 responds:

damn, better get rid of him, we don't want any mad survivors telling the new people that the creation of them was caused by a pair of gods getting bored and smashing two planets together